Be A Seed: Life Lessons from Debi White

Filed under Catherine's Thoughts on Sep 13 12 by

If you are anything like me, you probably believe a lie. Quite possibly, you believe multiple lies. What are they? We each believe lies that uniquely match our lives, but I would also be willing to bet that we believe some of the same ones.

Right now, the lie that’s on my mind is the belief that I must be perfect. You might be thinking, “I’m not perfect. I know I’m not perfect.” But there is a difference between knowing you aren’t perfect and being ok with it.

If we know that we all fall short of perfection, then why are we constantly striving? Why are we constantly trying to prove ourselves to ourselves to our friends, our coworkers, our spouses, our crushes? Why are we trying to prove ourselves to God? If we believe it is ok to not be perfect, then why do we beat ourselves up so badly when we make a mistake? Why are we the last ones to extend grace to ourselves? Why do we tell ourselves, “I should have known better; I should be further along by now”? Why do we compare our own personal growth and walk with God to everyone else’s? Why do we believe the voice that says, “You just don’t measure up”?

The truth is, God isn’t in this for your perfection, or mine. He isn’t in it for who you will be one day. He’s in it for the relationship, for who you are today. He’s in it for the unique journey you are taking together, because He loves who you are today.

Recently, Feed Your Strength columnist, Debi White shared this thought on her blog:

“Often we spend years wrestling in our seed stage. We sense there is something greater in us, but we feel stuck and restless. We might not realize that our best course in our seed years is to just…be a seed. Though we feel a bit lifeless and somewhat useless, we are, in reality, packed full of value, energy, and life waiting on our breakthrough moment.”

When I was in college, I worked with Debi at a church. I was a young, immature college student who was attempting to be a responsible leader while at the same time attempting to navigate college, dating, and relationships. I was almost always overwhelmed. Sometimes I didn’t know which decision to make, and I almost never knew how to properly handle situations with guys. I wanted to go out with friends for drinks, but would fear what someone in the Christian community would think. I desired to live a life for God, and I so desperately wanted people to see how great life with him could be.

As college ended and I struggled to decipher what God was telling me to do next, I drove myself (and probably those around me) crazy trying to figure out what God’s will was. I was so overly concerned that I was going to make the wrong choice and I was constantly wondering if I was hearing Him wrong. It stressed me out and kept me in a panic like state.

About six weeks after graduation, Debi said to me, “Stop driving yourself crazy trying to figure out if it is God talking. Give yourself a break. Stop expecting so much from yourself and your relationship with Him. Give God time to work.”

At first, I thought this was horrible advice. I thought if I didn’t know what God wanted me to do, it meant I was doing something wrong. I wasn’t listening hard enough or praying the right things. The Holy Spirit must have quieted me down, because I began to see that she was right. I needed to give myself some grace. The stress my worry was creating was exactly the opposite of what God wanted for me. I needed to trust that God was big enough to make himself known. I needed to honestly pursue him, act in honest faith, and trust that he who loves me would take care of the rest. I needed to just…be a seed.

You Are a Seed

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Catherine Smith
Catherine graduated from Western Carolina University with a degree in Education and has experiencing teaching both elementary and high school students. Catherine is passionate about helping women connect with their true purpose and discover their value. As the Community Relations Director, Catherine manages our outreach projects, events, and relationships with other organizations that support women.